The above quote is from a scholarly article by Weiler (for you Political Science nerds out there), that I recently read for my Public Opinion class, but it really struck a nerve with me. Weiler, when discussing authoritarianism, is discussing how you can't confuse how people act, with their actual attitudes, or who they are, something I think we can all agree is true, even if we all study different things.

This week, I got kicked out of one of my classes. I'm a good student. An obsessive student. I haven't gotten in trouble since maybe 4th grade, yet here I was, 20 years old, getting kicked out of class. I was using my laptop to take notes, as I typically do.....as well as surfing the web, Pinterest, working on blog ideas, etc, when 3 classmates and I were promptly booted from the room, without warning. 

 My behavioral manifestation and my actual attitude towards classes differ, but I realized, that what matters is the behavior, not the attitude. I could be all gun-ho about school, but if professors only see a sorority girl on Pinterest, then that's what they see and that's what they know. 

From now on, I will be conscious of if my behavioral manifestations match my actual attitudes, because if you don't walk the walk, why would it matter that you talk the talk?

Okay, full disclosure time. Part of my absence has been from busy work and just how crazy life can get, but part of my absence was from something else. I've been reconnecting with the religious and spiritual aspects of my life, and I was having a hard time reconciling how I could be a blogger, one that everyone could read, and talk about things important to my life. Just last year, I would've immediately left a blog if religions were mentioned, so I know there are people like that out there. What happened last night (don't worry, not a revelation, epiphany or exorcism) made me realize I needed to talk about some things.

On Monday nights I attend an on campus ministry at school, which is supposedly non-denominational. Being in Texas, things tend to be a little more conservative than I would like, but overall, I really like what I have experienced. Last night the guest preacher talked about narcissism--which I think we can all agree is very bad, but then he said something extremely alarming to me. The pastor began to talk about how the cause of depression and other mental health issues such as anxiety were rooted in narcissism and how we (as a generation) think to highly of ourselves, and how this causes mental illnesses. 
No. I'm sorry. No. Maybe it's because I know many people affected by mental illness or maybe it's because my political science research is based in attitudes towards mental illness, but I find this is an unacceptable thing to tell a collegiate audience. Studies have found the age for "trouble” with mental illness is 18-23 for girls and around 20-24 for boys. This age group was exclusively participating in the on campus ministry.

You cannot, as a person, as a leader responsible for pastor care, as an elder member of a community primarily comprised of students aged 18-24 that the reason they feel the way they do, the reason they are depressed, anxious, not eating, not sleeping, thinking of committing suicide, is because they think too highly of themselves, because they think they are too important. 

I tried to listen. I tried to keep an open mind. I eventually had to leave because I couldn't listen anymore.

Is acknowledging mental health issues and Christianity mutually exclusive? I don't believe they are. To me they are not. 

When will we get to an age when people universally realize that mental health is as important and as legitmate as physical or spiritual health? 

I don't know the answer to that question but until we get some answers, I have some things here for you, my readers:

If you are depressed, anxious, battling body image issues, whatever, please go speak to someone you trust. Go see a counselor. Suffering is not a requirement in life so don't make it yours. Things don't have to be as hard as they are. Mental illnesses are real. Mental health issues are real. They don't come from your narcissism, your sin, whatever. 

They. Are. Real. 

If you ever need anyone to talk to, please feel free to call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255.

As a member of Klout with a certain influence level, I get some perks, which are amazing! Recently, I got to get some Moo business cards at a reduced rate thanks to Klout and let me just say--I love them! Being in college, I really don't have a ton of use for business cards, but I feel like I'm always jotting down some notes, to-do lists or whatever and the Moo cards were perfect for that.

Arriving in a little sleek package, I knew I was gonna love these cards! I got to pick designs and photos I loved from Pinterest and Tumblr so my cards reflected who I am. Here's what some of my designs are:

Over all- I love these little cards and have been using them as much as possible- gotta love #MooPerks

Good afternoon everyone!
When life gets a little busy and I just need a way to settle down, I love to watch some spoken word/ slam poetry. I think poets have such amazing talent and it is such a joy to watch them preform. Here are a couple of my all time favorite poems.

1. Neil Hilborn's "OCD" is an amazing poem of love and has been blowing up all over tumblr and the internet. 

2. "God in Code" by Sam Cook is a perfect storm of anger, emotion and connecting past, present and future

3. I'm low key obsessed with Sarah Kay and Phil Kaye and their joint spoken word poetry. "When Love Arrives" is a beautiful poem that speaks truth, no matter who you are

Have a wonderful Monday everyone!

This has been a strange week.  Monday and Tuesday, I didn't have class because it was Fall Break. I spent the time lounging around, running some much needed errands (Halloween costume anyone?)  and just getting my act together before school got started up again. 
Wednesday, classes started up again. I had a stressful lab as well as Panhellenic meeting. Topped of with the  first night of initiation, it was safe to say I was back to reality.
Thursday, in the midst of classes, meetings and more initiation, I got food poisoning. Like skip every class I have, curl up in a ball and try to pass out, food poisoning. My sisters and friends were great about seeing if I needed anything, but when it comes to stuff like that, I don't know about y'all, I just prefer to be left alone.
Now, as I start to regain my appetite and go back to classes I realize that this week may not have had much
going on in terms of school work, but I was busy none the less.

Sorry about the long hiatus...keeping up with a blog is hard y'all! But I intend to do  mu